Fixing yourself makes you break yourself.
You identify a flaw. You research a solution. You implement a protocol. You feel better for three days. You regress. You identify a flaw.
It's not a journey; it's a centrifuge. The faster you spin, the more you feel like you're moving, but you're just pinned to the wall by your own expectations.
To improve yourself, you must split into two people: the sculptor and the stone. The manager and the employee. The judge and the accused.
But if the "you" doing the fixing is also broken, then the tools you're using are flawed. You cannot build a perfect house using a crooked hammer.
"The perfect schedule exists, but the person who can follow it does not."
You’ve been trying to solve a problem
that is also solving you.
Acceptance isn't giving up. It's realizing that you cannot polish a wave. You can only watch it break.
maybe you don’t need a new version.
just a ceasefire.